Turns Out 'Just Push Through' Isn’t a Personality Trait—Who Knew?
For years, I thought my ability to push through anything was my greatest strength. No matter how exhausted, overwhelmed, or disconnected I felt, I could always rely on sheer willpower to get things done. I wore my ability to suppress my needs like a badge of honour, convinced that resilience meant enduring at all costs.
It turns out, I was wrong.
Somewhere along the way, pushing through stopped being a superpower and started feeling more like a cage. The burnout, the exhaustion, the quiet resentment—I thought they were just part of life, part of success, part of being strong. But in reality, they were warning signs. My body was waving red flags I refused to see, and eventually, it made sure I couldn’t ignore them anymore.
The Cost of Constantly Pushing Through
Many of us have internalized the belief that stopping, resting, or reassessing means failure. We tell ourselves, I just need to push a little harder, I’ll rest when I’m done, I can handle this. But what happens when we’re never done? When life keeps demanding more and we’ve trained ourselves to override our exhaustion, emotions, and limits?
Pushing through often comes at a steep cost:
Burnout: The kind that doesn’t just leave you tired, but leaves you hollow. You stop feeling joy, connection, and even desire because all your energy is funneled into survival mode.
Disconnection from the body: The more we ignore our body’s signals, the harder it becomes to interpret them. Until one day, we realize we don’t even know what we need anymore.
Resentment & emotional depletion: When we ignore our needs, we expect others to do the same. And when they don’t, frustration builds—because deep down, we crave the care we refuse to give ourselves.
What If Resilience Isn’t About Endurance?
Real resilience isn’t about how much we can endure—it’s about how well we can recover. It’s about knowing when to push and when to pause, when to move and when to be still. It’s about listening, not just pushing forward blindly.
The key to shifting out of the ‘push through’ mindset is somatic awareness—actually tuning into what our bodies are telling us and responding in a way that fosters restoration, not depletion.
Learning to Listen: A Somatic Approach to Sustainable Strength
Breaking the ‘just push through’ cycle doesn’t mean becoming passive or abandoning ambition. It means learning to work with your body rather than against it. Here’s how:
Pause and Check In: Throughout the day, take 30 seconds to ask: What am I feeling right now? Where do I feel it in my body? Noticing tension, tightness, or heaviness can be a clue that your body needs a break.
Reframe Rest as Productive: Rest isn’t a luxury—it’s a necessity. Taking a breath, stepping away, or engaging in self-pleasure or movement resets your nervous system so you can return with clarity rather than exhaustion.
Practice ‘Intentional Softening’: Instead of bracing against life, practice softening into it. Drop your shoulders, unclench your jaw, take a slow breath. This small act of release signals to your body that it is safe to be, not just do.
Allow Desire to Lead: What if instead of forcing, you followed what felt good? Desire isn’t just about sex—it’s about ease, pleasure, curiosity. By cultivating what lights you up, you create a life fueled by something deeper than obligation.
Strength Is in the Stopping
It took me a long time to realise that stopping isn’t weakness. It’s wisdom.
Choosing rest, choosing self-connection, choosing to listen rather than bulldoze through—it’s one of the bravest things we can do.
So if you, too, have spent a lifetime believing that your ability to ‘push through’ defines your strength, I invite you to pause. To breathe. To ask yourself: What if strength wasn’t about endurance, but about knowing when to soften?
Because it turns out, just push through isn’t a personality trait. Who knew?
If overdoing it, doing everything, and pushing through has been your personality - it’s time to talk.
